Education vs. Early Motherhood.

I had a slight feminist moment today. It was during the delayed broadcast of Elder Russel M. Nelson's talk at a CES fireside.

I actually really enjoyed his talk - and cried when he spoke of his wife, and how she was more beautiful to him now then she was then. That's what we all aspire for in life, isn't it?

What got me, however, was when he talked about how it was bad that the number of unmarried people are increasing, and the age in which people get married are also increasing. And if I remember correctly, he also mentioned the decreasing number of children being born into this world.

He also spoke of how he had spent years and years getting certified (my does he have a long list of credentials!) before he sent out his first bill. By then he had had 5 of his 10 children. He counseled that women should support their husbands to become all that they can be, no matter how long it takes.

The first thing that popped into my mind was "What about the women?" If the men should spend as long as they need to get educated and develop their potential, shouldn't the women do that too? Are they supposed to be child-bearing at that time and deprived of that opportunity? Is getting married later and prolonging child-birth just a little really a bad thing?

It is a conflicting subject for me to think about. We learn about the divine role of women in church. And I do believe that for many women, their divine calling might be to be a matriarch in zion. When it becomes my turn, I am sure that I will be anxious to start my own fammily. I have spent most of my life wanting to be a mother. I do believe it is true that lasting joy comes from the family.

At the same time, there's a part of me that knows and understands importance of gaining a solid education and how that is essential to one's identity. What if an undergraduate degree is not enough? Can someone who is being left behind by her husband in his pursuit of knowledge be truly happy? Will you say that it is "bad" or "wrong" for a woman to wait till she's 32 before she starts her family? Or if she chooses not to have one at all? Is developing potential through education or a profession not seeking to build the kingdom of God?

I realize that it does not have to be a dichotomy. A woman can still have children and pursue an education/career. How women are capable of multi-tasking like that and still come out on top is beyond me, but I admire their persistance nonetheless. Also to be admired are the women who realize that learning doesn't stop after school. I hope I never forget that.

There may be a point in my life when I will have to decide where my priorities lie. How much self-sacrifice is required of us?

I don't have the answers yet. Just more questions. Elder Nelson did say that prophets and apostles always teach the rule, not the exception. He said that Heavenly Father does recognize that in this imperfect world, the exceptions do exist. I guess it's just a matter of discerning which the exceptions are and what to do in such an event.

In the meantime, it'd probably be a good idea to stop thinking about how women deserve to be educated and go to bed so I will make it to class tomorrow. After all, I wouldn't want to be a hypocrite.