First day of school anxiety!!!

NO! I'm not the one going to school (nope, I'm still stuck in this office) It's Ray's first day of elementary school. I have it all figured out - 6 was the best age ever because it was pre-elementary. *sigh* I'm going to lose my innocent little bro! And he'll have so much homework, he won't have time to play with me anymore. :(( I hate school and having to send off one brother after another to them kid destroying organizations. He did look so CUTE though in his school uniform. THAT'S IT! My kids are going to be HOME schooled!!!! (That and maybe I'll date a uniformed guy next... hmmmm...)

Coming in to the office today was extra depressing. Probably because Han didn't come with me to work now that he has to go to school. But mostly because Mark's left for the airport. And even if he was in home or in school, it wouldn't quite be the same talking to him anymore.

The office has a smell - one I'm very familiar with. Stale air conditioned air I think. (Conditioned to be stale?) I only notice it when I first step in. I know that smell too well. When I take a quiff of it in, I think of 2 years ago when I first started work here. (HOLY ENTERPRISE! I turn 20 this year!!!) I would come in the office just as early and talk to someone else. Only at 9, Elisha my BUDDY would come in to work. And I loved my job.

I couldn't wait to leave to Hawaii then, but I hadn't left home before so I guess my outlook on things was very different. That and come to think of it - I had a best friend then. One that was like "NO WAY, I'm not dating you!". (Actually, like all relationships that are like that, I'm sure one person liked the other - at least to start with. I think he really liked me. Ah. Only I had a "boyfriend" I would talk about 24-7. He was a pre-mi anyway) Man that was nice though. He even comes back from his mission this year in October. Wow. Them Utards better not have brainwashed him TOO much!

I'm trying hard not to think about the fact that in about 20 hours or so, I should've been at the airport to greet Mark. Life's all of the sudden empty when you're not sure where to put your love anymore. Don't you think? I'm transfering all of it to THIS account. The new love of my life. http://fayemin.blogger.com Maybe I'll adopt a teddy bear. Hmmm. Naa. I'll stick to blankie - even though she IS a girl. I don't want a teddy bear that switches names every two weeks. Matt, no - Jared - no, Mark- no wait - Jill, hey - aren't you a GIRL???!!! Wait -what's your name again? How about Boyfriend Replacement #2?

You know, even if I turned bi/lez, I'd have less prospects. I don't know how to flirt with girls!!! Hey guys - gimme a tip or two? loL! Uh - no thank you. I like men better, you can't have a claim to being better if you date someone from the same sex!!! No fun! That and I can't deal with my date's PMS issues. Maybe I should date a drama queen though - that'll teach me!

Ok. Bored and lonely. Time to go take a nap on my couch. No David to fight with for it anymore. *DING DING DING!* At this point, I'm about ready to have HIM here just for company.

*shudder* loL! Uh- or not! That's almost worst than the thought of turning to my parents. No - gay AND retarded are definitely not a good combination.

Hope I didn't blog down your mind too much with my issues. Don't let me get to you - unless I'm trying to date you! Hasta la pasta babes!