Daddy's little girl.

I don't get hit with homesickness very often. Mostly because I don't take the time to think about my family. When I do talk about them, or talk to them, that's when I realized how far away from them I really am, and remember just how much I love them and the tears start pouring down.

Dad just called. He's in Singapore and apparently from a cellphone in Singapore, you can call the US for the same domestic rate. Pretty cool. He's taken advantage of that and called us a couple of times now.

It's not always easy to talk to Dad. Not that he's a difficult person to talk to, but that we don't know what to say to each other really and it gets kind of awkward. There's more of an emotional barrier between him and me than there is between my mother and I. I don't think it's uncommon. Men seem to keep at arms length when it comes to emotion, especially my Dad. He doesn't really understand it.

We still talk. About work. About church. He told me about Elisha coming home from his mission this Saturday, and how the chapel is almost done being remodeled. He asks how I'm doing of course. I tell him little details about swing club and not having a dance partner. But it just seems strange to be telling him about it. I don't know what it is. I guess not being really close to my Dad in that sense, even though I know he's concerned with what's going on in my life, it seems so silly to tell him about it. Like I fear he wouldn't really be interested.

Then of course, he asks about how things are going for us financially. And as usual, talks about getting Su and I multi vitamins.

Dad's way of showing us that he cares. Sometimes I wonder if he misses having Su and I around. He's probably not home enough to notice.

I appreciate him so much though. I'm crying simply from gratitude. I'm not sure how far back you've read my blogs. There was a long period of time when I was home that I was really bitter towards him for a few separate reasons. I didn't really get over that bitterness even after I came here. Not having to deal with it because he was so far away made me forget easily, but it would resurface everytime I talked about him.

I think I've finally moved on. I love my Dad. When I was younger, Dad was my favorite parent. He was the fun guy - Mom was the scary one. They kind of switched roles as we got older. Of course, we started having brothers and they got his attention, and we got Mom's.

Of all the children in my family, I think I know Dad the best. He has been so thoroughly involved in raising me and I had the opportunity of working for him a couple of times. I didn't enjoy it very much at the time, but it was bonding time between us. It gave me insight on what he really does for our family. And I am grateful.

Dad isn't a perfect parent, he has his flaws, but I'm glad he's my father. As we hung up after talking briefly, I couldn't help but think about my Heavenly Father. I'm not sure what analogy I could draw from here, but for some reason, I feel that my relationship with my earthly father reflects my relationship with Him. I don't really compare them with each other alot because our relationships are so different, but I suppose I could change that.

I don't really know why I felt I had to blog about this since I'm not really sure what I intended to say. All I know is that I had to publically express my love and appreciation for my father. I owe everything I enjoy now - life here in college - to him. I know he really cares about what goes on in my life, though he has his own way of expressing it. He's always taken good care of my family and I should remember to thank him more often.

I miss my family. I often forget how big a part they play in who I am. I am so glad that I can speak of them with fondness.

I can't think of much else to say. Except that I have the most wonderful family in the world. And I'm glad I got to talk to Dad today.